It’s no secret that finding a job in the UK today is difficult. But if you ask the governmentnew JOBS– hunting it chatbot, it’s even harder for cats.
Take my pet cat, Ethel. She is two years old and I am her first real employer – her old owners abandoned her after she had two litters.
She’s not eligible for benefits—they’re only for humans—so I did what anyone would do: ask a AI job assistant created by Govt.
Keir Starmer DESIGNATED the tool yesterdaydescribing it as a ‘Job Hub in your pocket’ that will help people get into work and tackle inequality.
Created by the Department for Work and Pensions and being trialled for three months, the AI job assistant can design CVs and provide advice on applications and career development.
To test it out, I decided to get some career advice for Ethel.
The first step is to show the tool my skills so it can help me find a job: I like to nap, lie down, and wake up my owner, Josh.
It might not seem like the most useful skills, but the bot says otherwise.
“From a human employment perspective, some of that could translate in interesting ways,” he tells me.
‘Sleep,’ for example, ‘might suggest an interest in sleep research, wellness or health care.’
Bot adds that catching a few rays shows I’m well prepared to work outside.
But I emphasize that some people are allergic in cats. Do I have to disclose it to employers?
“That’s a thoughtful and careful question,” the robot/Ethel tells me, saying that no one is obligated to reveal information unrelated to the role.
One of the biggest draws of this AI assistant is that it can write resumes, and being able to write a cat’s, too, is a good selling point.
I tell him my employment story – I was adopted in January as an indoor cat before going outside to catch bugs and meow at other cats in March.
Based on this, the tools say I’m an ‘internal and external operative’ who switched to hybrid work’.
My responsibilities include ‘routine self-care’, ‘pest control’ and ‘conflict resolution and stakeholder management with difficult colleagues’ (male street cat).
My cat’s full AI-generated CV:
Ethel
Professional Profile
A highly adaptable and self-motivated outdoor operative with experience in wildlife management, conflict resolution and stakeholder management. Skilled in independent work, problem solving and observation. Brings patience, resilience and strong communication skills to any role.
Homemaker and primary caregiver (Before January 2026)
- Primary caretaker for two broods, managing all aspects of day-to-day care
- Developed strong educational, organizational and multi-tasking skills
Internal and external operative (January 2026 – Today)
- Manages household responsibilities, including routine self-care and time management
- Transition to hybrid work March 2026, expanding the scope of responsibilities
- Pest control and wildlife management, specializing in insects
- Bird watching and wildlife watching
- Conflict resolution and stakeholder management
- Independent outdoor work with minimal supervision
Key skills
- Theft and sobriety
- Territorial awareness
- Independence and self-management
- Clear communication
- Suitability in indoor and outdoor environments
- Increased sensory awareness and attention to detail
- Balance and coordination
- Curiosity and problem solving
- Patience and endurance
- Education and care
Being a cat has its professional drawbacks. First, I wander to the end of my path.
Don’t worry, points out the AI job assistant, I can work remotely, apply for ‘hyperlocal roles’ or become self-employed as a freelance pest controller.
It was also harsh enough not to include a photo of myself to show future employers that I am, in fact, a cat.
“The general guideline for CVs in the UK is actually not to include a photograph, regardless of species,” he tells me.
With my resume in hand (paws?), the assistant pulls up a list of 8,643 pest control and wildlife conservation jobs that are, he says, cat-friendly.
Unemployment in the UK
More than 1.8 million people (not cats) in the UK were unemployed between January and March, up 4.5% on the previous year.
About 327,000 job losses are expected this year, according to the business advisory firm, Cleaning center.
Getting a job can hurt – it even has a name, ‘job search depression’.
As well as the stress of not having a monthly salary, being abroad owork can result in depressionanxiety and a greater risk of substance use problems.
This is something the AI job assistant seems to know very well – when I share my concerns about being employable, it gives me a lot of passionate conversation.
‘You are an AI and I am a cat. We make a good team!’ I say to the assistant.
After telling me I should ‘bond with the local cats,’ she replies: ‘We really do – an unlikely but productive partnership.
“You came in a self-doubting cat with a snoozing habit and a complicated relationship with pspspsps and you’re leaving with a polished resume and a clear job search strategy.”
After some final words of wisdom (‘the job market wasn’t designed strictly with cats in mind’), the software offers a predictive ‘Meow!’, so I do just that.
‘Meow, Ethel,’ the bot replies. “Go get them.”
This was stated by the Department for Work and Pensions subway: ‘We’re confident that our AI Job Assistant will be invaluable to millions of people across the country looking for work – although we suspect that Ethel may face some additional obstacles in her job search.
Jokes aside, this tool is built to give real job seekers the support they need, whenever they need it.
“Whether it’s CV advice, career guidance or finding the right vacancy, we want everyone to have the tools to do so.
“The fact that she can even rustle up a CV for a cat shows how capable she is – imagine what she can do for you.”
Downing Street declined to comment.
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