Month after one Jaipur A fifth-grader died after jumping out of her school, recently resurfaced footage from her last day shows her repeatedly approaching teachers while being bullied by classmates. Her parents had previously raised concerns with the school. The clips have reopened critical conversations about the tragic cost of unheard pleas for help.
For Sam, who graduated in 2019 and was bullied for being ‘different’ at a popular inner-city school, those memories start in first or second grade. They say that the bullying did not only come from classmates, but also from teachers and school authorities. “Everyone around me thought I was the problem and they made my parents believe that,” says Sam.
Psychotherapist Kala Balasubramanian says that when children’s repeated cries for help are rejected, they often begin to believe that something is fundamentally wrong with them. During their formative years, that message can become deeply internalized, leaving them vulnerable to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem well into adulthood.
For Sam, the very people who were meant to teach and protect him were also among those who bullied him, affecting both his grades and self-esteem.
For Nikhil, HARASSMENT took another form. He was in the seventh grade when his father died by suicide after financial difficulties. Instead of compassion, he says, he found cruelty. “My classmates started making fun of me because my father had died,” he recalls. “Then they told me I had to put another noose around my neck.”
The verbal abuse soon turned to physical. When his mother approached the school, Nikhil says, the authorities sided with the bullies and he eventually had to change schools.
Psychiatrist Dr Safiya MS says that when authority figures dismiss or minimize what they are going through, many children internalize the belief that they are somehow unworthy of protection, a perception that lasts for a long time.
Others describe quieter forms of bullying that proved just as enduring. Aarav recalls being isolated after reporting bullying to teachers. Rohit was called names by his peers because he was an “outsider”. Maya remembers being kicked out of her school as a second grader because of an influential senior. Usha still carries the trauma of being drowned until she nearly passed out when she was in second grade.
Psychotherapist Anjana Moraes says that when children discover that talking doesn’t change anything, the ensuing sense of hopelessness and isolation can shape the way they approach relationships and authority for years.
(Names have been changed to protect identity.)
